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Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Dear Burda Style back issues: stop mocking me!

"Someday you might sew me... I looked really awesome on your friends!"

Dear Burda Style 2010 back issues falling off my bookshelves and spilling into my pattern drawer,

STOP MOCKING ME. I know I don't sew as often as some of your other lady friends, but it's not that I'm afraid of tracing or anything. 

It's just that well, you showed up EVERY SINGLE MONTH that I subscribed to you and some months I can't even pull out my sewing machine, never mind dive into a sea of criss-crossing colored lines and extract a stylish colorblocked knit dress.


And sometimes I leaf through you and circle ideas for things I might make someday, but then I don't, and I think you're laughing at me.


By the time you sent me the maternity-themed-issue above, I was already in labor (for FIVE days I might add, not that that's your fault or anything). What's up with that?

To be honest I've only ever sewn one Burda Style magazine pattern and it was awesome, but the experience of altering it for maternity and deciphering the binding instructions left me a little exhausted.


Please stop pretending that somehow, someday I am going to stand on the beach with the wind in my hair and say "oh, you know... I just traced up this Burda Style pattern last night and threw it together on my serger without making any mistakes. No big."


I just can't take it anymore. I know you are awesome and economical and have cool trench coats and unusual blouse construction and smarter, better fit than the Big Four and if I was a lot cooler, I would find the time to hang out with you.

But I just don't think we belong together anymore.

So yeah. I'm selling you all on eBay starting at $1 each. I hope you can find a faster friend who will trace you like there's no tomorrow.

Sincerely,
Mikhaela

P.S. Please don't be offended that I'm keeping my Ottobres.

10 comments:

  1. I have had the same feelings for Burda but some time last autumn/winter I actually found myself sewing from current magazines. It didn't last though. Being from Finland I too appreciate my Ottobres :)

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  2. I cannot comment on Burda magazines but I really like your writing style :)

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  3. but you're only selling in the US :o( bugger!

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    1. Just fixed the shipping for the four issues that don't have any bids yet... international shipping now available!

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  4. Ha! Love this post. And even though I REFUSE to trace those crazy patterns, I"m strangely tempted to buy your back issues?!

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    1. Ha! It's hard NOT to... I did keep a few issues, including the one I've already sewn from. I actually really like magazine patterns, because you can buy one issue for $10-$20 and get a LOT of stuff to sew. The problem is just I sew so very SLOWLY and I also have a whole drawer of Cake and Colette and Sewaholic and Oliver + S and Ottobre and Jalie and... etc. So I thought I'd let someone else enjoy them, and I could use the proceeds for fabric and yarn. :)

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  5. Burda really is a high maintenance friend, isn't she? Those are some really good issues too! I've sewn from almost all of them!

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    1. Ha, I was TOTALLY thinking of the awesome stuff you made when I gritted my teeth and listed them for sale... especially that dress at the top!

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